Ok… so you all know how I remind you to “Love Yourselves First!” Well, I have to remind myself of this as well at times. These pics are a collage made up of moments/experiences, that I have enjoyed, like my FWmnn podcasts/blogs/vlogs, acting/improv, ‘Tales with Nana MJ’, a lil Bday vaca to the Grand Canyon with My Love and his side of the family, my Rosy boa “Baby,” a trip Carlsbad beach with My Love, and of course precious time with my granddaughters. I’m thankful to have had these times, where I’m able to feel contented and happy. Here’s just some of those special moments over the last year. A lil bit of me all wrapped into one.
This past week (since Mon) had put me into a momentary tailspin. A lot going on… As I may have mentioned, I had to have a biopsy done on my uterus/ovaries recently. Now, I need another even more invasive biopsy done next month, because the last one came back as unusual, possibly pre-cancer. While there, we checked my BP 3×; once even manually, and additionally discovered that I have extremely high blood pressure, 170/110 – which is the high end of Hypertension stage 2, just below Hypertension crisis, which is 180/120 and extremely dangerous. I’m not far from that, as you can see, and in danger of a heart attack/stroke. So this has been a very stressful week, to say the least. I was handling all of the news, with that “smile” we have all learned to embrace, and my sweet Dr even commented on how well I was taking it all in. I said, “I have to smile, it‘s what keeps me sane. If I don‘t, I‘ll cry!” She said she understood my thought process. She is very gracious and warm, with the sweetest most soothing voice; which definitely doesn’t hurt in these types of situations. She urged me to go directly to my GP; another Dr I’m so thankful to have, that truly listens and cares. But because of the holiday, they had closed the office at 3p. That was it, “The straw that broke the camel‘s back!” so to speak. I was holding it all together, until I wasn’t… The tears came rolling down my cheeks in an instant! Why!?! Another health issue? Don’t I have enough of them to deal with already? Funny thing about that… there is no quota! As we’ve all come to discover at some point, during this long ass journey, with an unending supply of surprises, and not the fun kind, that come with cake and ice cream, nope not that; it’s the kind that comes with more poking and proding.
Now being that Thanksgiving is in tow, everything is going to be closed, so I have to wait until the following Mon to address my newest friend; Hypertension stage 2. So what to do Now? This news didn’t exactly decrease my BP by any means. So after much contemplation, and talking with my bestie Kelly, we agreed that Xanax might be a good choice for now. She knows how I hate to take meds, but she was correct in suggesting it. So I’m taking half of a Xanax when I get up, and the other half at night, before bed. I had noticed the increasing BP over the last few months, but thought it may just be “White coat syndrome,” so I didn’t question it. I should have, in hindsight, because I’ve had on occassion, chest tightening, irregular heart rythym, and a couple moments where my heart felt like it tried to jump out of my chest; once while sleeping (that scared me a bit), and once while awake.
Only two more days now to see my GP, then hopefully, I’ll get my BP under control quickly, as I have a trip coming up. I’m going to see my sister, her hubby, my five nieces and nephews, and my bio dad (just found them all 6yrs ago, and dad has dementia), my bother in-law, my sis in-law, and my lil nephew; in Florida for a week, and then in Maryland; I’ll see my aunt’s, uncles, and cousins, whom I haven’t seen for many long years, so I’m way past due getting to see them.
I’m anxious about being in airports… the plane ride, no problem, but the airports, ugh! But I’m staying focussed on the good stuff; being able to spend quality time with family, enjoying meaningful conversations with my many amazing fibro friends/family, and having an awesome man in my life. I‘m thankful for you all!
You‘re not alone… and neither am I!
Love you all 💜💋MJ
*I want to mention My Love Bill, whom is the reason I get to go on this wonderful trip. He takes care of me like no other. He is my rock, my world, my moon, and my stars! He’s going to forego this trip, to stay and work his butt off, to complete a goal he’s set for himself at work. Get that bonus baby, I believe in you! 😍
My two sons, my two granddaughters, and my daughter in law 💜