Broken, yet Beautiful…

We are broken, yet beautiful… 

Beautiful expressions, 

of whom we once were,

ever evolving within,

art, music, literature.

Indeed fractured

yet strong, so resilient, 

filled with emotion.

Hearts on our sleeves,

too huge to camouflage, 

beneath our flesh.

Vulnerable platforms, 

purging ourselves,

of what lies within.

Imperfect beings, 

Hearts too full, 

Feelings so raw, 

Minds still misunderstood…

MJ Aragon

You are not alone

and
neither am I! 

Love
you all ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’‹MJ 
FIBRO WARRIOR, My New Normal link: 

https://www.facebook.com/FIBROWarriorMNN/

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Our Life is Filled with Half Days

I came across this question, on another group I admin for. They asked, “Does anyone else have half days?”Meaning they run out of energy after only a few hours of being up/awake.

The spoon theory really comes in to effect with this, and this is my take away from it. We have to ration ourselves… decide what’s most important to accomplish each day, knowing our reserve is low. Do I take a shower, or do I do laundry, or dishes, or clean, or run errands, or decide to eat at a restaurant or at home; if I go to a restaurant, I’ll have to do some driving but no cooking or clean up, if I eat at home, I’ll have to cook and then I may be too tired to wash all of the dishes, so maybe I’ll just make soup, that’s easy enough; so then maybe I’ll have some energy left to read a book, nope, the book is too heavy and my hands hurt, so maybe I’ll just listen to an audio book or music. Everything we do, no matter how simple it may seem, steals a lil bit of energy from us, so shaving in the shower may have to wait, because you’ll need the energy to wash your hair. Yes, those minor things have become less than minor for us. Something the average person could not ever comprehend. 

So if you need that nap, take it, our bodies need it, and we all know that sleep, REAL sleep, is so very damn hard to come by! Never feel guilty for what you can or can’t do! We each have our own limits, and this illness has six stages. So, you do “You” the best you know how! We are stronger than we appear, and our strengths come in many forms, we just have to navigate through them a lil more creatively ๐Ÿ’œ
Apologies, that turned into a bit of a rant, Haha! ๐Ÿฆ‹

You are not alone! Love you all ๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’‹ MJ
Christine Miseradino’s article The Spoon Theory: http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com

I share her article on my podcast, here is the link for Episode #25 “The Spoon Theory” on YouTube: 

FIBRO WARRIOR, My New Normal 

https://www.facebook.com/FIBROWarriorMNN/

Climate Changing

Both politically and environmentally, our climate has changed. If you deny global warming, you have to ask yourself “Why?” If you think that it’s not your job to help those in need, again ask yourself “Why?” I love helping others, it’s what I do, and I do it gladly. Doesn’t it feel good to help a friend in need, or to clean up your neighborhood, or to help educate others? The answer is most likely a resounding “Yes!” Doing good deeds, give us endorphins, and we all know what a great feeling that can be.

I am in fear for our future. More so, my childrens and grandchildrens future. What will be left for them? Will our government make things even worse than they already are, will people kill each other over their beliefs even more freely, will Mother Nature have her way, and finally destroy us all? It’s not unlikely! Fires, earthquakes, floods, tornados, hurricanes… Is this not a clear warning that we need to get our shit together!?! We can all make a difference, and yes it’s a small difference if only one person chooses to… but, if we all try just a lil more fervently, we can at least put a few speed bumps in the middle of what is happening to our world. We are all accountable for what has become of this big blue marble, ALL of us! If we continue to turn a blind eye, and think to ourselves, “This doesnt impact me. or, “What is my effort worth? or, “Im just one person, thats not going to make any difference!, you are sadly mistaken! It does impact YOU, your EFFORT is worth Saving Lives, and yes, ONE person will make a difference; because each ONE adds up to many

I avoided the news, and politics, most of my life; because they weigh heavily on me. I take too much on, and that eventually impacts my health. I worry, a lot… about everyone, and everything! So it is important that I take these issues on with ease. But, right now, it’s NOT about me, it’s about my family and friends all over the world, dealing with disasters both environmentally and politically! I’m in heartbreak right now over our countries state of being. The ugliness that is erupting from all sides is deplorable! And yes, some are light years WORSE than others. I’m not here to point fingers right now, but I am here to say this…

Please, do your part! No matter how small, or how big, just DO something. The hatred needs to F’n stop! Love is what I choose. So, show a lil compassion, clean up your environment, help out those in need, recycle some things, stop putting yourself above others; we are equals, use a lil less water, show why your side is good; without belittling the other, drive less and ride a bike/walk more, enjoy nature instead of sitting on your computer/phone all day, reach out to loved ones more, pick up that trash on the ground; and place it in the right reciprocal, donate to a good cause, say “HI” to your neighbor or call your cashier by name (they’ll smile, I promise), and just be a better YOU overall. If each of us did our part to be BETTER people, the world around us could be a better place to live. These are small things I’ve suggested, because starting with the small things makes the larger things more accessible; hence viewed as possible, instead of impossible

Lovehughelp… one another! 

It’s easier than you think, and it will change you… It will change you in amazing and wonderful ways! This I know. So let’s all Love not Hate, have Compassion not Disillusionment, Lift Up not Tear Down, and we will become better people, whom will leave a better climate, both politically and environmentally, for our children, and our children’s children. 
It all begins here. Join me, please!

You are not alone! Love you all ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’‹MJ 

#FIBROWarriorMyNewNormal Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/FIBROWarriorMNN/

A Poem – “Every Day”

I have to work so hard,

Every day,

For something that comes,

So easily,

For many others…

To be “Happy”

It’s an object, on a pedestal…

A light, that’s just out of reach…

A feeling, that I’ve yet to master…

And a word, that has lost its meaning…

Yet, I try, and try

To be worthy of this object…

To reach this light…

To master this feeling…

To reevaluate it’s meaning…

Every day,

Every day,

Every damn day!

-MJ Aragon

“Why do we have Fibromyalgia?”

Pain/Fibro, Childhood/Adult PTSD, Depression, Anxiety…

Here is the short version, for most of us…

When we are quite young, and have traumatic events occur in our lives, our brains are still developing at that point. So anything like physical/mental/sexual abuse, surgeries, accidents, etc., causes a change in the way our brain developes. Once altered, it is unable to function normally as it should. So we are often left with ongoing issues like childhood/adult PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, Fibro; and for some of us, much more. 

Me at around 3 or 4yrs old, I’m guessing… about the time my abuse began.

We go through life after that, often questioning and/or blaming ourselves; for everything that we go through, or that happens to us. When in reality, we are left to feel inadequate, because of the traumas we’ve endured, through no fault of our own. But because this has all been SO misunderstood, we took it ALL on ALONE, in most cases; which comes with it’s own set of guilt rendering issues. Those around us cannot ever truly understand what that is like. We can only hope that they will empathize with, and love us for who WE ARE, not what illnesses we have. 

Love yourself first, the rest will fall into place.

Because of all that we’ve been through…

I know that you are stronger and more loving for it! It is people like us, that makes our former selves (others now going through what we have), feel less alone, understood, and loved because we have truly been where they are.
*This post was inspired by a conversation I just had with a fellow Fibro Warrior named Rosa Elena. I love it when someone asks the questions that inspire me to write posts like this. Thank you!

You are not alone! Love you all ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’‹MJ
*This is what I’ve discovered and purely my opinion, after tirelessly researching, medical articles, medical videos, as well as my own questions proposed to others in my FIBRO groups. MJ

The purple haired FIBRO WARRIOR

“My Letter to You”ย 

My Dear Fellow Fibro Warriors

“Darling, I am so sorry…”

โ€ขYes “sorry“, we use this word too often, I’m aware. But I truly feel that way, when I’ve missed something, or someone’s cry for help. I try to remember everyone, and reach out when I can, but alas, I am only one person, so I miss things unintentionally, and then inevitably I feel terrible, when I’ve discovered that I have…

“I wanted to see what was going on with you? I know you and I are not best pals and that the distances between us are great, but please know that I’m here for you, if you need a non-judgemental ear and/or shoulder.”

โ€ขThat’s what we should do for each other, because not everyone will.

“No one, shares their true selves on social media, it’s let’s “keep up with the Joneses“, or “one upping“, or just simply putting a “pretty mask” over what we are all really dealing with. I am a private person, and I have only recently been able to share the truth with everyone, on my FWmnn podcasts/blogs. It is with much trepidation that I share some things, especially when it comes to my children. That’s the toughest and most heartbreaking thing to share. But I know that sharing those things, can help others, as well as allow them to see that I am true and trustworthy, because in this climate and social media nonsense, people feel more disconnected than ever!”

โ€ขOur truths shall set us free…

“I feel what you are going through; been there, and I can’t honesty say, I will never be there again, because we just don’t really know what life will throw our way, at any given moment. Life is a crap shoot, and we just have to figure out how to navigate through this rocky terrain.”

โ€ขDuring our journeys, there will be flat/straight roads, but we should be here for each other during all of them, especially the toughest terrains. That’s when those less experienced, will fall to the wayside.

“I hope that you haven’t let those less than worthy people in your life, have any more of an impact than they F’n deserve! You are YOU, and no one can understand your trials and tribulations more than we can. You have to be knee deep in the crap, before you could even begin to have a concept of what strength it truly takes, to pull yourself up and out; when after all, it would be so much easier to just give in or give up! On my darkest days… I have to WORK to stay present, to stay around for my loved ones, whether they believe me, believe in me, or not. It’s so tormenting to know, that the ones you love the most, could seemingly care less. We have to climb up and out everyday, because our illnesses, etc., tear us down and try to put us under, every night. I know how strong you are, and not just as a “woman” or a “man“, but as a person, whom tries to take on the world, helping those they can, while trying to stay possitive, sane, happy… all by ourselves.”

โ€ขWe all try so hard to be present. So be proud of yourselves!

“You are not alone, you are loved, and I am here for you; if and when you need me. Love and hugs to you all, my darlings!”

“FYI, please feel free to share this with anyone, because I am not afraid to speak my mind, nor share my thoughts with others! Remember to… 

Be open, feel free to cry when you need, and then be the strong person we know we are!” ๐Ÿ’‹ ๐Ÿ’œ MJ

โ€ขThis was mostly a message I had sent to a friend the other day, whom is struggling like we are. But after writing it, I realized that this is how I feel for, and about, all of you! So this letter/message is to all of my fellow Fibro Warriors, young, old, male, female, every race, religion, orientation, etc., I am here, I love you, and with open arms I embrace you. You are my family, and you are truly not alone! Love you all ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’‹MJ
#FibromyalgiaAwareness

FIBRO WARRIOR, My New Normal:
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Recieved the new canvas of my logo! ๐Ÿ’œ

“Childhood Expectations”

โ€‹Sometimes a simple picture can evoke feelings you didn’t know you’ve had…

From a young age, we look forward to whom we might become one day, and have the highest expectations of what that could be; Doctors, Firemen, Astronauts… I mean, we were children, everything seemed possible in our youth. Not at all realizing, what big shoes we must fill, that our expectations don’t always coincide with what life throws our way, and how they will become vastly unlike the fairy tales that we’ve once read.

This illness makes us feel much less like a princess or prince, and more like the Little Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe, or Humpty Dumpty who fell off of the wall; only the shoe was also full of holes, and humpty’s peices were misplaced. Has reading all of those “Happy Endings” set us up for real disappointments in life? In a way, yes!

First of all, wanting to only become a princess (I was a tomboy mind you, so being a princess was not on my list), is putting a chokehold on the minds of witty young girls. We can become so much more than someone’s arm candy, or a trophy wife, and thankfully many of us are! Telling us that this is all we have to look forward to, is not conducive to our powers within. The Princess and the Pea comes to mind, the power to detect a pea beneath twenty mattresses and twenty feather beds, pretty impressive I’d say, haha! We do feel that sensitive at times, no kidding; many a sleepless nights for this gal!

All joking aside… to those of us whom rose up to the occasion, and became independent, I applaud you. But we have also come to realize, that having and raising a family, is indeed hard work as well. So the fairy tales of yore, were deceiving in many fashions. And thus we were unprepared for life’s “gifts“, of tragedy, traumas, and illnesses. Yes there were, and are, wonderful things in our lives; family, friends, and celebrations, of course, but those “Happy Endings” seem to be completely out of reach.

These days we can be left feeling more like the eccentric Miss Havisham, from Charles DickensGreat Expectations (another favorite of mine), only we’re waiting for the “Ending” instead of the “Happy.” The ending of pain, the ending of disbelief, the ending of loneliness. We’re trying to just feel normal, and our “New Normal” is filled with searching… searching for the cure to what ails us. And if we do indeed find it, I guess that will be our…

HAPPILY EVER AFTER!

Youre not alone! Love you all ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’‹MJ
#FibromyalgiaAwareness

FIBRO WARRIOR, My New Normal
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